Sunday, September 09, 2018
This Is My Brain on Audiobooks
When told that you should spend as much time as possible resting, most of us would be thrilled. I was not. I couldn't help feeling as though I were being punished. For at least three and a half days, there was to be no knitting, and-- most heinous of all-- no BOOKS. I couldn't get in the pool for an even longer period of time. I obeyed instructions, but only because I wanted my eye to heal properly. I wasn't about to go through all this and not have the best possible results!
Now I can hear many of you immediately begin to chant, "Audiobooks! Audiobooks!" Okay, folks, I hear you. I hear you! Problem is, not everyone is cut out for audiobooks. I've tried them in the past and found them to be the best cure for insomnia outside of watching the Golf Channel; however, I thought I'd download the app to my iPhone, buy an audiobook, and give it another try. The last time I'd gone over three days without reading was a very long time ago. As in I didn't know how to read. But the doc said no reading, so no reading it would have to be. I settled down to have a listen.
This may also be the time to say that I don't like wearing earbuds or headphones. Not only do I feel slightly claustrophobic, I also feel like prey that a leopard is sneaking up on. I want to hear the sounds around me, and I know this stems from walking to and from work and needing to be aware of my surroundings. You see, I encountered young men exposing themselves, and a stalker who kept trying to separate me from the rest of the herd in the parking lots I walked through. (Those were fun times.)
Then there's the fact that I can read a lot faster than the narrators can speak. I wanted to put the book on Alvin the Chipmunk speed, but then I think I'd laugh my way through the story.
The final thing I noticed while I slogged through the audiobook was the fact that I wasn't retaining any of the storyline. It was as if my ear canals were lined with Teflon. Nothing stuck. Everything just slipped right on through. (In one ear and out the other?)
Physical books don't have droning voices to put me to sleep either. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to go bookless all over again for the next round of eye improvements. I don't think I'm going to try the audiobook route again, but I won't rule it out completely. But I did find something to smile about.
When I attended The Poisoned Pen Conference, some folks wanted to know how the eye procedure went, and as I told them, I learned that almost every single one of them don't like audiobooks either. I am not alone! Now this is the time for you to picture me pumping my fist in the air a couple of times and then toddling off to read a book. A real book. With a cover. And pages. And that new/old book smell...